The Web Planet (Story #13, 1965)
Viewed 05, 19 Jun 2012

Doctor/Companion: One, Ian, Barbara, Vicki
Stars: William Hartnell, William Russel, Jacqueline Hill, Maureen O’Brien
Preceding Story: The Romans (One, Ian, Barbara, Vicki)
Succeeding Story: The Crusade (One, Ian, Barbara, Vicki)

The reactions of the uninitiated never cease to surprise me – and it’s not that long ago since I was one of them! When jA declared after The Curse of Fenric that it was the weirdest thing she’d seen, I considered the gauntlet thrown down.

I’d foolishly forgotten/not checked to see that Web Planet was six episodes long, so we ended up having to split it into two sessions. jA, jO and I were present for both, but jE missed the first time, and L missed the second. Once we got into it, though, the responses were, shall we say, rather varied.

At first, it was fairly upbeat. The Zarbi were initially well-received (“I love ’em!” “I love how they make electronic noises.”), and the exchange between Barbara and Vicki about the state of the art in medicine and schooling in their respective time zones intrigued all the Ladies. By Episode 2, though, things started to go a bit downhill.

The Menoptera elicited giggles and a “what the hell?” as well as the observation that “those [wings] are made out of shower curtains.” Vicki, though I think her personality went down pretty well, came across as “pretty helpless.” Then there’s the bit when a Zarbi runs into one of the cameras – “that was awesome!” I, for one, love how you can hear the Zarbi costumes creaking as they move (and just think about the poor saps who had to wear them – their backs must have been in absolute agony!).

No one much commented on the plot (funny, that). The focus was all on the effects and other oddities -like when the Doctor’s astral map gets wheeled out of the TARDIS to be used out where the Zarbi can guard their captives. jA noted it was certainly a “long-ass cord” and L loved that “it’s just plugged in.”

Vrestin’s random alteration of Ian’s name caused a bit of confusion. “Who’s Heron?” wondered jO (the sentiment was echoed by jE when she joined the story later). It’s a weird thing to add in – and it’s never explained – but I actually like that bit. It’s kind of the inverse of the way we Anglicize foreign names, which adds a bit of depth to the Menopteran culture/TARDIS-translated language, to my mind.

The pièce de résistance, though, had to be the appearance of the Optera: “O… K… ?” “What in the world?!?” I seriously can’t contain my giggles every time they’re on screen. They’re just so … absurd. (On the other hand, while I can’t agree with jO’s comment when Nimini makes her sacrifice (“How is this not the best one ever?”), I will admit that the moment always makes me a little sad.) However, jE was generous in noting that “actually, the costumes are better than the later years.” And she really liked the set.

By the end, even jO – who still claims it’s one of her favorites – was saying “don’t ask” to exclamations of bewilderment over various plot points. As the closing credits rolled, all jE really wanted to know was, “what inspired you to choose this one?” When I mentioned jA’s reaction to The Curse of Fenric, all was made clear, and jA admitted that she stood corrected.

General reactions:

• jA – “That one wasn’t my favorite.”
• jE – “That was a bit odd.”
• jO – “One of the most interesting ones we’ve seen”
• L – Didn’t appear to grab her, if sleepiness is any indication
• mrfranklin – You want bizarre? I’ve got your bizarre right here…

There are pieces I can enjoy in Web Planet, like how the Doctor actually takes a bit of a lead in the planning/cunning front, and Hartnell really is quite good here. It’s also fun to notice how much of a proto-Borg (wrong fandom, I know…) the Animus is as it assimilates everyone it can trap (it even says “Your struggles are futile!” at one point!). But in all honesty, there’s a good reason Web Planet showed up on my “worst story ever” poll. It’s darn close to the top of that particular list.

Verdict: Thumbs middlin’ (depending who you ask)

Looking ahead: Terror of the Autons