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Confession #16: I Hate the Non-Regeneration

Warning: profanity ahead
Now anyone who has an opinion about Doctor Who in its post-Hiatus incarnation is almost guaranteed to have a further opinion about one particular moment. Whatever your feelings about the “Bog-Standard-Regeneration-Effect #1” (and you can read mine in Confession #4), its use for the faux climax of Series 4 at the end of The Stolen Earth was a bait-and-switch of epic proportions.

Even putting aside Doctor 10.2 and how that whole storyline played out – which is the part about which most Whovians (whether the neo- or paleo- variety) would be most likely to offer their two cents – the actual Non-Regeneration Event itself was, in my opinion, a travesty against God and man (or against Doctor and Fan, if you will). Why does it put my knickers in such a twist? I’m glad you asked; I was going to tell you anyway.

Here’s the deal. Everybody knows (and by “everybody” I mean anyone who cares enough about Who to get their knickers in a twist about any aspect of the show) that Time Lords only get twelve (count ’em: 12) regenerations (thirteen incarnations). Evidence indicates that (a) regenerations could be stolen (as the Master tried to do at least once) and (b) Time Lords could grant further regenerations to another Time Lord (as offered to the Master in The Five Doctors). To me, that indicates not only that they are discrete units, but also that they are a commodity – not to be discarded haphazardly. Sure, Romana seems to have done just that in Destiny of the Daleks, but she was young, and it was (apparently) her first time; we can forgive her her debatable indiscretion. The Doctor, on the other hand, having already burned through the majority of his share (no, I don’t give any credence to that insult of a toss-off line in The Sarah Jane Adventures!), ought to know better by the time he’s Ten.

Oh, wait! Except that it didn’t fucking matter!

Thanks to the handwaving asshattery of RTD, the “official” line is that that particular regeneration didn’t count toward the Doctor’s total of twelve for some reason. Somehow it miraculously healed Ten without changing him, and then was siphoned off into The Hand, fizzling out like an interrupted sneeze (or similar bodily function). And because it didn’t complete the process within the Doctor, we’re told, that means it’s like it never really happened at all. Do over!

What utter bollocks.

Let’s back up for a moment. What is regeneration? Various explanations have apparently been offered throughout several different media, including once on-screen in Mawdryn Undead. Nothing I’ve seen suggests to me that starting-but-not-finishing it would in any way change the basic process. As I see it, once you’ve triggered it, there’s no going back.

Think about this scene specifically, too. The regeneration energy had to go somewhere. Ten couldn’t just stop mid-process and say, “OK, I’m done! I didn’t really want to change, so I just paused in the middle. I’ll go back and finish another time.” Regeneration is unstoppable. So he funneled the damn stuff into his own hand, so what? Then it should have turned into an Eleventh Incarnation! (Don’t get me started on 10.2…) The process that was begun when that Dalek effectively exterminated Ten should’ve used up one of his regenerations, making Twelve his last incarnation instead of Thirteen. It’s as simple as that.

Somehow, I doubt The Grand Moff cares one whit about my opinion.

4 Comments

  1. PaulGreaves

    Grrrr…
    You’re absolutely right, it was complete bollocks. Although I love the cliffhanger of the regeneration having started, the only way the pay off could ever have pleased me would have been if they’d done what I have long wished for over the years: the Doctor regenerating mid-way through an adventure and having to defeat the bad guys while coping with post-regeneration trauma.

    Unfortunately, as expected, we get the usual new series twattery that rewrites established continuity for no good reason and we’re supposed to take it on the chin because, if you don’t you get hammered and insulted by fans and the showrunner for being a sad old fan who can’t cope with change. I have no problem with change within the show as long as its for a good reason and not just shock tactics. My problem with most of RTDs stories is that they build up really well, then he seems to have no real idea how to finish them.

    What makes it worse is Tennant’s off the cuff line remark along the lines of “Why would I want to regenerate as I’m having such a cool time?”. Really? That’s so smug and annoying I wanted him to fuck off and die that instant. It’s almost as bad as the petulant “I don’t want to go”. Oh, you don’t? Neither did the others but they got on with it without blubbing – and they didn’t get half an hour to tie everything up with a neat little bow…

    I’ll stop there, as this is definitely heading towards FanRant territory 🙂

    • mrfranklin

      the King of Deux Ex Machina

      RTD certainly had some irritating storytelling habits, including laughing in the faces of longer-term fans. He seemed to love to act like he knew Who better than anybody else (which he clearly didn't), and just piss on decades of televised "canon" (whatever that is; different for every fan, really).

      In this particular instance, I'm mostly irate that RTD seemed to think he could burn off a regeneration without actually burning it off. Sick and wrong, on multiple levels!

      And yeah – right now I'm not going into the "Why would I? Look at me!" comment or the eventual change to Eleven.  Different rant(s).  😉

      • PaulGreaves

        It’s not getting any better
        It’s not getting any better either, as Moffat’s using Bog Standard Regeneration Effect #1 for Matt Smith and the little girl. He’s also introduced the idea that a regeneration can be interrupted. I was always under the impression that it was an unstoppable force of nature. If it isn’t, why didn’t the Master nip down to the Fourth Doctor’s prone body and zap him while he was broken on the ground?

        I wouldn’t mind the idea if it wasn’t for the fact that it’s shock tactics again. They keep telling us the Doctor is REALLY dead. Well, of course he isn’t as if he was then the show would be OVER. Whatever contrivance he comes up with to get out of it, it’s ultimately a piss-poor threat as it just isn’t final.

        Bollocksbollocksbollocksbollocksbollocks

        • mrfranklin

          Just can’t get worked up

          I know what you mean about "yes, it's really the Doctor, and yes, he's really dead!" I don't think there's anyone over the age of 8 who actually believes that to be the case. There's no series-long tension there because it's such utter codswallop.

          I really wanted to love Series Six, and so far it's mostly a fun romp with little true substance. … Except, of course, The Doctor's Wife. That's a gem. 🙂

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