With a brand new series nearly upon us, teaser trailers, images, and episode titles for Series Nine are everywhere. If one spends any time at all online, they’re easy to find, and difficult-to-impossible to avoid. I’m not a complete spoiler-phobe (which is good, because I wouldn’t be able to use the Internet if I were), but I do like to maintain a certain level of surprise going into a new season. It makes me feel like a stick in the mud, but with all the publicity on social media (which is where most of my Internet experience happens), I’ve gotten to the stage where I pretty much stick my fingers in my ears and shout, “LA LA LA!” to keep from learning things ahead of time.

I do watch trailers put out by the production team—that’s part of the show, in my opinion—and there is some news that I could only miss if I were oblivious to other fans online (e.g., return or casting of certain characters/actors). For the most part, though, I ignore the hype: I don’t go look at the behind-the-scenes, on-set photos that the BBC spams out; I’ve only watched two trailers once each (I don’t even know if that’s all of them or if there are more); and I have not read the titles of any of the episodes beyond the first two (which were plastered all over the prologue video), though I mistakenly glanced at a couple that I didn’t scroll past fast enough in my Twitter feed. (By the way, I’d like to offer hearty thanks to the others in the FB groups of which I am a member for only linking to the list, rather than posting it outright.)

Although I recognize that there are those out there who like to skip to the last page first to find out whodunnit when they’re reading a mystery, or who need to read the ending of their book after the first chapter or two to learn whether or not their favorite character survived the slaughter, I do not actually understand such people—not at a gut level. I’ll to do the whole “live and let live” schtick with someone who wants to know everything possible ahead of time, but the idea that it’s fun to learn every twist before even knowing the story just baffles me.

This is sheer speculation now, but I wonder if the way we interact with stories depends on how we process strong emotion. I am definitely an introvert (particularly on the Social, Thinking, and Restrained axes of the STAR model), and I readily connect with characters (or people I don’t even know, in news stories) in a visceral way—”all the feels,” as the tumblr crowd might say. Is it different for people who do not so readily give themselves over to empathy? (Note: I’m not saying that people who do not view/process stories the way I do are not empathetic; I’m merely hypothesizing that some people find it more difficult to put themselves willingly into that vulnerable mental space.)

Perhaps when a reader/viewer prefers more emotional distance, spoilers are a way of softening potential blows and allowing one to prepare for intense experiences within the storyline. For example, I know someone who prefers reading stories to watching them because if the situation gets too hairy, you can always put a book down for a while; a show or movie, on the other hand, keeps throwing things at you (especially given modern styles) before you have a chance to process and recover when things go poorly for the characters.

I can’t help but wonder if folks like this friend of mine don’t mind—and sometimes even seek out—spoilers as a way to help give shape to their expectations. “Be Prepared,” and all that. If you have an idea what’s coming, you can brace yourself and weather the storm. (Please, someone who loves spoilers, let me know if I’m way off base from your experience. As I say, this is all pure conjecture.)

At any rate, I get irritated if I know what’s going to happen before I begin. Much of the fun of fiction, for me, is in the unfolding; I find it most rewarding when I don’t know what’s coming, other than through my own processing of plot clues. There is admittedly a necessary balance between too much and too little, blatant telegraphing and willful obfuscation. But overall I like to figure it out on my own, without having been told beforehand what to expect.

So if you try to talk to me weeks ahead about what you think may be coming up in, say, the series finale because you heard X, Y, or Z, don’t be surprised when I turn away, cover my ears, and reply, “I’m not listening!” Write it down somewhere for posterity, and when it’s all been broadcast, then you can brag about how you called it. Until then, let’s talk about stuff everyone in the conversation has seen.